Let's invade England!

Cross border tension between England and Scotland is rising ahead of the Word Cup.

First of all the Birmingham Post has only gone and dissed The Shetlands for being depressing (reporter Shahid Naqvi worked this out without even going there - give the man a Pulitzer I say!)
The Shetland Times has hit back saying that Birmingham is full of gun crime, racism and pollution.

Secondly - the Sassenachs are trying to impose their completely immoral and indefensible fishing licenses on the Scottish section of the River Esk. Fishing in every other river in Scotland is FREEEEEEEEEEE, but because the Esk also flows through England, the bastards claim rights to tax the Scottish bit.

Fuck diplomacy - let's nip this in the bud now by invading. Brown can take No.10 and we'll sabotage Sven by forcing him to pick Drunken Duncan.