Update on Glasgow Glass Ban

For those of you who’ve been asleep at the back of the class...I have, in previous posts, attacked the banning of glass from pubs and clubs, and Glaswegians for accepting it like sheep - in fact the last time I was in Glasgow not one of the locals I was with was even aware that the ban was coming.

The ban is the brainchild of Gordon MacDairmid - Gordy is head of the Glasgow Licensing Board. He is an elected councillor, but - and this is a bit confusing - he claims that the Licensing Board is independent and cannot be politically influenced. So you could convince your local councillor, your local MSP and local MP that you and your fellow citizens were against the ban - and this little fatso would just ignore you. That’s your devolved democracy in action!

Glass attacks are vicious, result in hideous trauma, disfigurement and even death - a close friend of Caledonia Calling’s Alex McLemon quite literally saved the life of one Glasgow punter when his jugular was severed in an attack in the posh West End. Indeed this attack - in the sort of posh place that Glasgow doctors hang out is one of the reasons that a blanket ban rather than a selective (ie ned pubs) one was brought in.

The ban also allows for the use of perfectly acceptable toughened glass so why therefore am I still against it?

Firstly it fundamentally infringes on our freedoms. Want a bottle of Sol with a lime in it? Want to sit with your bottle of tonic and top up your G&T. Want to enjoy a whisky in a nosing glass, or a cocktail in a martini glass? Well not in Glasgow. Gordy has decided that you’re not grown up enough to be trusted with glass. He’s not going to do anything to target troublemakers, he’s not going target the cause of casual violence, he’s just going to withdraw your right to these few small liberties.

Secondly this is, to use the unavoidable cliché, the thin end of the wedge. What next? In Texas undercover police officers arrest people in bars that they think MIGHT drive their cars. Scottish politicians are already worried about how fat you all are - shall we ban chip shops? Motor Bikes are dangerous, cause horrific injury and are uneccessisary - let’s get rid of them.

If protection from all of life’s vagaries is what you want then buy a condom, wrap yourself in cotton wool, and lock the doors and never come out. For fuck’s sake don’t let politicians chip away at your freedoms in your name.

Frank Murphy of Glasgow’s Pot Still has been in touch. He, along with certain trade bodies, is admirably fighting this ban. MacDiarmid is arrogantly dismissive of public opinion so these guys need your help. Write to your politicians, talk to your local landlord, shout, scream and complain. But for fucks-sake don’t let me visit Glasgow again and here the pathetic bleat -”What glass ban?”

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Nanny state bans glass from pubs
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Things you canny do in Glasgow - part 5 in an ongoing series